No Fond Farewells
I once read tragic accounts of an ill-fated commercial airliner that became doomed, due to an inflight mischance of some kind, which badly damaged the tail section. As a result, the plane lost the use of its hydraulic assists—somewhat akin to losing power steering and power brakes on a car, as it barrels down the highway. The loss of its “boosters” severely restricted the nature and scope of the maneuvers that the aircraft could perform. Cascading mechanical failures also made the stricken airliner much more difficult to control, even when executing the smallest and simplest movements.
As the airship was traveling over water when the mishap occurred, there was no place for the pilot to put down, even if he could somehow manage to land the suddenly ponderous, leaden, and sluggish machine. There would be no diverting to an alternate destination.
The cockpit crew fed all the relevant metrics into the on-board computer: altitude, attitude, airspeed, prevailing winds, fuel consumption…Based on the data, the computer estimated with reasonable precision, the duration of time that the airframe could remain aloft under these conditions. Fortunately, there was ample fuel left. Unfortunately, it was now chiefly good for postponing the inevitable by a brief, soon to be foreclosed period.
The tense captain called mayday, radioed his position, and succinctly described the emergency he faced. As he fought to keep the plane flying straight and level, he made a few of the only decisions left open to him:
- Whether to inform the cabin crew of the true state of affairs [He would, he decided, not so much because the attendants deserved to know, but because he would need their help to maintain calm.]
- Whether to be equally forthcoming with the passengers [He should, he concluded, as it was within his power to afford them an opportunity to prepare for their entrance into the hereafter.]
The flight deck was brought up to speed. Crew members were given a few minutes to deal with the initial shock of the devastating news, to regain their composure and to make what peace they could with cold, hard reality. Then, the passengers were acquainted with the facts. Everyone on the airplane learned that he or she had an appointment with destiny that day, and that it was unavoidable—nothing could prevent a single individual from keeping it.
Reactions, as may well be imagined, were all over the spectrum. There were manful efforts at denial—arms crossed, heads shaking vigorously from side to side, in a vain attempt to reject the truth. Others demanded of some invisible arbiter to know why this tragedy should befall them, of all people—as if they might be content to accept their lot if only a suitable explanation were provided. Still others appealed to some invisible court that the situation just wasn’t fair. The only response to such protests was the steady hum of the engines. Many wailed or wept. Many prayed openly—something few would have done just moments before. Some made confessions of one kind or another, admitting to misdeeds and expressing remorse. Those who called out to God to intervene called on the name of Jesus, though not on any other name.
[This is not atypical, and suggests that Jesus is uniquely identified in their minds, with things like miracles and deliverance, in a way that other objects of worship are not. Can it be that they have heard that “Jesus saves,” and may on some level, believe it—even if they make no effort to get to know Him? If it were mere superstition, wouldn’t a plethora of deities be invoked, rather than one in particular?]
By far the strangest reaction from my point of view, was the impulse of many to compose letters and messages to loved ones while the clock on their own lives ran out. [Full disclosure: everyone with whom I have privately shared this view, without exception, disagrees with me. They don’t think it weird at all.]
My puzzlement at the behavior of those who opted to spend their last moments writing to friends, family, and significant others, stems from the question of purpose. Perhaps it was cathartic for them, and nothing more; especially since the missives were highly unlikely to be received. Maybe it provided an engrossing and welcome distraction from the terrors of their own predicament. Then again, the messages may have represented a last-ditch grasping for permanence, or the wish to leave some sort of legacy, should the sentiments somehow survive their authors.
But the subject matter of the personal notes is baffling—at least to me. Apparently, most consisted of fond farewells, assurances of love for the recipients, last-minute apologies and belated requests for forgiveness. There were pleas to always remember or do this or that, and admonitions against recalling or doing the other. Secrets were divulged and grudges released, hopes expressed and promises made or solicited.
Not to be morbid, but I have tried to imagine what it might be like to be a passenger on a plane that I knew was certain to crash. I have tried to visualize myself writing maudlin notes to loved ones while awaiting death, and being virtually assured that my notes would not be received. I have never been able to picture it.
Among other reasons, I can’t help thinking what a two-edged sword it would be to actually receive such a note. On the one hand, it may be of some comfort to know that the addressee was in the sender’s final thoughts. On the other, those final few words might reopen wounds caused by the tragedy every time they are read, keeping grief alive and preventing healing. It seems almost cruel. Would it not be better to allow loved ones to remember us as we were, rather than envisioning us huddled in a cramped chamber, scribbling our own epitaphs?
More to the point, I cannot see the use of saying a lot of things that at that stage, should no longer need to be said. If, for example, my spouse does not know by this time that she is loved, no epistle hastily jotted at 35,000 feet will solve the problem. No fond farewells can fix it.
Yet, my readers don’t know me as well as she does. They can’t observe my behavior from day to day. For their sake, I should probably consider what to tell them if this were my one and only chance to share what God has done and offers to do for them.
I can’t help but pray that I’d use my last words to urge the reader who does not have a personal relationship with God to discover how to begin one. Then, I would lay it out for them, like this:
Admit that you are a sinner: “For all have sinned, and come short of the glory of God” (Romans 3:23). “As it is written, There is none righteous, no, not one:” (Romans 3:10)
Acknowledge the fact that your sin drives an impenetrable wedge between you and a holy God: “But your iniquities have separated between you and your God, and your sins have hid his face from you, that he will not hear.” (Isaiah 59:2)
Believe the good news: Jesus’ suffered and died on the cross to pay the full penalty for your sins. His resurrection proves that His sacrifice was accepted, anchoring our hope of a resurrection like His. “Moreover, brethren, I declare unto you the gospel which I preached unto you, which also ye have received, and wherein ye stand; By which also ye are saved, if ye keep in memory what I preached unto you, unless ye have believed in vain. For I delivered unto you first of all that which I also received, how that Christ died for our sins according to the scriptures; And that he was buried, and that he rose again the third day according to the scriptures“ (I Corinthians 15:1-4)
Trust in God’s love and grace: “For scarcely for a righteous man will one die: yet peradventure for a good man some would even dare to die. But God commendeth his love toward us, in that, while we were yet sinners, Christ died for us.” (Romans 5:7-8)
Follow God’s plan: God made a way for you to come back to Him, by believing in Jesus, confessing Him as Lord, and repenting from your sin:
- “Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.” (John 14:6)
- “For there is one God, and one mediator between God and men, the man Christ Jesus” (I Timothy 2:5)
- “Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name [than Jesus Christ of Nazareth] under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.” (Acts 4:12)
Call upon the name of the Lord—Jesus promises that all who turn Him in faith will be saved. He will turn no one away who turns to Him: “All that the Father giveth me shall come to me; and him that cometh to me I will in no wise cast out.” (John 6:37)
Rejoice and tell others! “Therefore being justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ: By whom also we have access by faith into this grace wherein we stand, and rejoice in hope of the glory of God.” (Romans 5:1-2)
Don’t delay: “(For he saith, I have heard thee in a time accepted, and in the day of salvation have I succoured thee: behold, now is the accepted time; behold, now is the day of salvation).” (II Corinthians 6:2)
“And I saw the dead, small and great, stand before God; and the books were opened: and another book was opened, which is the book of life: and the dead were judged out of those things which were written in the books, according to their works. And the sea gave up the dead which were in it; and death and hell delivered up the dead which were in them: and they were judged every man according to their works…And whosoever was not found written in the book of life was cast into the lake of fire.” (Revelation 20:12-13, 15)
It may seem like a lot to take in, but it’s critical that you get what you need. For those who need just a bit more, read on. I pray that the Holy Spirit will make everything clear and impress upon you that it is true and urgent.
HOW TO BE SAVED:
- Admit to God that you are a sinner (that you have not kept His moral law to perfection; in your thoughts, words, and actions you have done what His law forbids and have failed to do what His love demands). This is seeing yourself from God’s point of view and agreeing that He is right about you. Be as specific as you can.
- Believe in your heart that Jesus died for your sins and that God raised Him from the dead.
- Sincerely repent (turn away) from your sins, asking God to forgive you and to use His power to help you resist temptation, no matter how strong the pull of sin may be, at first.
- Acknowledge Jesus as the Lord of your life. Invite Him to move into your heart and take up residence there, so that He can change you from the inside out.
- Trust His promise to save you and give you a new spiritual birth and a new nature (thoughts, desires, priorities, hopes, dreams, and character).
SOME KEY TRUTHS:
- “For the wages of sin is death: but the gift of God is eternal life through Jesus Christ our Lord.” (Romans 6:23)
- “For God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him should not perish, but have everlasting life.” (John 3:16)
- “But as many as received him, to them gave he power to become the sons of God, even to them that believe on his name.” (John 1:12)
- “Behold, I stand at the door and knock: if any man hear my voice, and open the door, I will come in to him…” (Revelation 3:20)
- “For whosoever shall call upon the name of the Lord shall be saved.” (Romans 10:13)
- “That if thou shalt confess with thy mouth the Lord Jesus, and shalt believe in thine heart that God hath raised him from the dead, thou shalt be saved.” (Romans 10:9)
- “Verily, verily, I say unto you; He that heareth my word, and believeth on him that sent me, hath everlasting life; and shall not come into condemnation; but is passed from death unto life.” (John 5:24)
- “But these are written, that ye might believe that Jesus is the Christ, the Son of God; and that believing, ye might have life through his name.” (John 20:31)
- “These things I have written unto you that believe on the name of the Son of God; that ye may know that ye have eternal life, and that ye may believe on the name of the Son of God.” (I John 5:13)
One thought on “No Fond Farewells”
Thank you for your words. May we learn to speak truth in life and not just in the fond farewell!
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